It starts out with the hallmarks of being your greatest love. The connection and chemistry are next level intensity and as early as the first date you may already be thinking this could be the one.
Don't worry, you're not alone. This can actaully be triggered by a sophisticated ruse of mirroring which sparks a deep attraction and a feeling of connection.
But as the shiny newness fades and the initial whirlwind of romance is cast aside, the bad behaviour kicks in and suddenly you find youself in the danger zone.
You really should run for the hills, only you missed (or ignored) the red flags and now you’re too emotionally invested. You convince youreslf to stick around hoping it'll get better, that things will go back to how they were in the beginning.
Only the truth is how they were in the beginning was never real.
Unfortunately sometimes we can cross paths with someone who's emotionally dangerous. Far from having our best interests at heart they consistently seem hell bent on withholding the love and respect we deserve.
Prevention is better than cure, but the next best thing is putting this kind of emotionally damaging relationship to bed early so you can maintain your integrity and self esteem and get out before the real damage hits.
Because it will inevitably get worse and you’ll continue to get hurt.
Recovering from an emotionally damaging relationship can take months, sometimes years and it can leave behind some pretty nasty scars to some pretty deep wounds.
Moving forward this kind of relationship can seriously impact your own emotional availability to future loving relationships and happiness.
Darling, you've always deserved better.
**Download the 30 Ultimate Relationship Red Flags PDF guide here**
RED FLAGS should never be ignored. They're an early warning from your own inner gudance system that knows something is out of alignment. If you resonate with these ultimate relationship red flags you’re almost certainly in the danger zone and you need to pay attention and act fast.
You may even be in a relationship with someone suffering from narcissistic tendencies or who is sociopathic. In which case the damage will continue to escalate way beyond your control .
This isn’t about fault or blame or even labelling someone a bad person, but more recognising that for various reasons some people are not emotionally available and due to their own deep unhealed wounds have become emotionally toxic and destructive. These people will destroy your confidence and leave a negative impact on you, head, heart and soul.
If you’re seeing red flags you must wake up to the strong possiblity that the relationship on offer isn’t the happy, loving, respectful relationship you deserve, and no matter how hard you try or how long you stick around, you won’t change the other person.
He’ll continue to treat you badly for as long as he can get away with it and the longer you tolerate his bad behaviour the more damage he’ll do.
It’s not your fault that you’re being treated this way, but it is YOUR responsibility to get out of it.
Staying is giving your permission for this treatment to continue.
Acknowledge that he’s consistently shown you what’s inside him and what he has to offer you. And know that the longer you stay invested in the fantasy that this relationship is going somewhere, the more damage it will inflict on you.
**Red flags are warning signals that you need to take very seriously**
You’re being shown that the worst is yet to come. You need to act and get out before your self-esteem crashes to the point where you convince yourself you can’t leave and/or you leave but keep going back.
Once out of the relationship you need to then evaluate why and how you were led into such a damaging relationship in the first place (read toxic relationships and trauma bonds)
You truly deserve better and there’s a wonderful loving, caring, respectful, emotionally available person waiting to give it to you. BUT first you have to get clear on what you want and what you’re worth. AND you must be willing to resolve the chinks in your own armour and claim your right to love and happiness, inside out.
Whatever way you look at it, life’s too short or too long to be settling for bad relationships.
When we keep attracting people who can’t give us the love and respect we deserve we can be chasing a feeling that’s more to do with our deep subconscious patterns and unresolved emotion that we mistakenly take as connection.
Every relationship gives us feedback for learning more about ourselves and resolving the issues within us that aligned with it in the first place. Once healed we're free to pursue and find the kind of gentle, passionate, heart-centred love that sets our soul alight.
Don't settle for anything less.
Dawn Lee is a Personal, Professional and Spiritual intelligence coach™ with a passion for melding psychology and spirituality. Dawn's expertise is leading others out of personal and relationship crisis and into clarity to find happiness, peace, love and connection inside out. Her mission is to help shine a light of awareness in the world and connect others back to their happiest, truest, more fearless selves. Discover how to work with 1:1 with Dawn.