Oh baby, you feel so lost. Running in circles. Chasing your own shadow trying to feel whole again. Who even are you, what do you want, where are you going, and how on this sweet earth are you going to get there?
Nothing's making you smile.
No-ones getting you like they used to.
The old conversations have dried up, they do nothing for you anymore. You're tired of talking; who's listening anyway?
The fire went out and you're sifting through the ashes wondering how can you rebuild? Where do you start? You're trying to construct a self even you don't understand anymore.
Where do you go?
How did you get so lost?
Well, I know this for sure because I've been lost a few times now. Or so I thought. But what I discovered was that I wasn't lost at all, more I was hanging onto something that was.
My old beliefs.
My old thoughts.
My old patterns.
My old ways of seeing the world, seeing myself.
I wasn't lost, I was emerging. Only I was trying to hold onto the very skin my higher self was urging me to shed. I thought that skin was me. Silly. I thought if I let it go I'd sink deep into the black abyss and maybe never be heard of again.
"Oh yes, Dawn .... I'm not sure what happened to her..."
Well instead I let go. First of the story I was lost, and of the need to be found. Neither were true.
What I needed was to unravel, deeper. To be shaken awake and cracked the f*ck open like champagne at a Grand Prix.
I needed to let myself bleed all the way out of the old pain and suffering that had formed a hardened shell around my heart. I needed to let my anger out, to be weird, to cut myself off and commit to doing whatever it took to come through.
And this time I needed to stay. To not run away from myself, not numb the pain with alcohol, or distract myself with people who never turned out to be much good for me anyway.
I needed completion. To welcome home the parts in me that had been severed, stuck and fractured, so I could emerge whole.
And boy did I.
Brighter than the clearest diamond.
I don't agree that we're lost, or flawed or broken. That's ego talking. That's the shit you want to lose. That's the self you want lost and let go. So if you're feeling lost, or just thinking it, let that shit go too.
You're changing baby ... just like you wanted.
Didn't you say it?
Didn't you wish it?
Didn't you pray to god and ask the angels?
Well here it is. Only it doesn't look like you thought it would, all pretty and such. No, maybe so. But I can tell you what's underneath it is something more beautiful that you've yet to imagine.
If only you'll let it through. If only you'll give it time. If only you'll drop the story that you're lost and let the last of your skin shed.
You're not lost. You've just never truly been known to yourself and that's what your soul is pushing you for now.
Need help with it? I have two coaching spots opening up next month for my 12 week program. If you think you're ready and you want my help connect for a free call and let me help you discover yourself, once and for all.